
The object of Hoopfest, of course, is to win games. Well, and to have fun, too. But there’s a secondary, less-discussed contest underway and that’s the battle to have the most creative (or funniest, grossest, most macho) team name in the field.
We’ve gone through the more than 7,000 teams entered in this year’s tournament and handpicked a few of the more amusing titles and handed out some not-soofficial awards to those who went the extra mile. If your squad is not on the list, we’re sorry. You’ll have to turn your attention to the actual basketball.
BY THE NUMBERS
In 1990, there were only 512 teams, equal to 2,009 players.
More than 7,000 teams and 28,000 players are playing this year.
42 city blocks cover this year's various 3-on-3 games.
Hoopfest will bring roughly $38 Million into Spokane.
Organizing these basketball battles are 3,000 volunteers.
- Kara Stermer
Best Potential Matchup
This Better Be Fun vs This is Not for Fun
Best Emo Band Name
Tears of a Gypsy
Best Beverage Suggestion
Beer Flavor Gatorade
Best Display of Immaturity
Watch R Balls Bounce
Best Gangster-Derived Name
Ankle Bustas or Arthritic Mafia
Best M.F.-ing Name
Samuel L. Jackson
Best Pretend Animal
Lazer Wolves
Best Honesty
I Need a Breather
Runner Up:
I’m Fat and Slow
Best Use of One Word
AnthonyDavisUnibrow
Best Dressed
Bad in Plaid
Best Low Blow
Shawn Kemp’s Kids
Best Finesse
Blue Prancing Ninjas
Best Word Play
The Angry Nirds
Best Illicit Drug Reference
Trippin’ Balls
The: “Try Again Next Year” Award Goes To...
TOOOODRUNKTOOOO- DUNK