Two of the best TV series of the '90s, Homicide: Life on the Street and The Drew Carey Show, are finally available to stream after years in legal limbo (on Peacock and Plex, respectively). The Big Lie about streaming services is that everything you'd ever want to watch is just a click away. Nope. Several beloved shows from yesteryear are nowhere to be found (yet). Here are a few of 'em we long to see.
ED (2000-'04)
New York City lawyer Ed (Tom Cavanagh), fired from his law firm and dumped by his wife, returns to his small Ohio hometown of Stuckeyville to clear his head. When he runs into his high school crush Carol (pre-Modern Family Julie Bowen), he impulsively buys a rundown bowling alley to open a legal practice in it, hoping to stay and finally win Carol over (solid plan). Ed premiered three days before that other small-town dramedy, Gilmore Girls, but is still only available on bootleg DVDs.
SCTV (1976-'84)
For nearly 40 years, comedy cultists have lamented the scarcity of Canadian sketch series SCTV (Second City Television). The cast — including Eugene Levy, Catherine O'Hara, John Candy, Dave Thomas, Rick Moranis, Andrea Martin, Martin Short and Joe Flaherty — attained G.O.A.T. comedy status in later years, but the dementedly DIY show that launched them is still absent from streaming. Unlike with Ed, at least there are official vintage DVD sets out there for sale.
ALLY MCBEAL (1997-'02)
It was created by the Taylor Swift of hit legal dramas, David E. Kelley. It averaged 12 million viewers per season on Fox. Lucy Liu, James Marsden, and Robert Downey friggin' Jr. were co-stars — so where the hell is Ally McBeal? The one-time cultural phenomenon about a smart but emotionally erratic young lawyer (Calista Flockhart) featured one of Kelley's best ensemble casts ever, but it mysteriously disappeared from streaming at the end of 2023. As with most things, I blame Disney.
BEGGERS & CHOOSERS ('99-'01)
The Chris Isaak Show remains the most frustratingly unavailable Showtime original of all time, but the dark Hollywood satire Beggars & Choosers is right up there. The series is set behind the scenes at a major TV network where everyone is screwing everyone else in every sense of the word, preceding similar Tinseltown takedowns like Action and Entourage. Unlike those, Beggars & Choosers features a fiery female protagonist in Charlotte Ross, who went on to NYPD Blue.
RUDE AWAKENING (1998-'01)
Another lost Showtime gem, Rude Awakening was Sherilyn Fenn's first — and last — long-term TV gig after Twin Peaks. She stars as Billie, an unemployed soap opera actress struggling with sobriety and myriad self-destructive tendencies. Rude Awakening is a comedy, BTW. An endearingly awkward and cringe-y comedy at that, because the show was shot like a cheap network sitcom minus a laugh track, rendering the show's rhythm wonky AF. Fenn should have been a comic star.
UNHAPPILY EVER AFTER ('95-'99)
Married ... With Children co-creator Ron Leavitt helped launch The WB TV network in 1995 with a virtual clone that could have set Fox lawyers up with a fleet of yachts. So Unhappily Ever After added an alcoholic stuffed bunny voiced by Bobcat Goldthwait — perfect. Goldthwait's Mr. Floppy is disgruntled car salesman Jack's (Geoff Pierson) answer to Fight Club's Tyler Durden, making for some surreal post-Alf sitcom-ery. The show also stars Nikki Cox as a red-hot Kelly Bundy upgrade.
SON OF THE BEACH (2000-2002)
FX prides itself as the long-established home of highbrow dramas, but the cable network's first scripted original was a ridiculously filthy Baywatch parody. Son of the Beach, produced by Howard Stern and starring unsung comedy genius Timothy Stack, was a solid half-hour of double (and single) entendre, dick puns, and straining swimsuits that defied the laws of physics. If Son of the Beach ever streams, it'll be on Fox Nation as an anti-"woke" beacon for BarcaLounger edge lords.
WEEDS (2005-'12)
Mid-00s Showtime hit Weeds actually is available to watch on a few free streaming apps, but with a major caveat: It's the PG-13 version with all of the Showtime-requisite profanity and nudity scrubbed out. Yes, the comedy still holds up well, even in these 420-friendly times, but this feels like being slipped a bag of oregano. Also, why is one of Showtime's most iconic shows not on Paramount+ with Showtime, Paramount+Showtime+Taco Bell+KFC, or whatever it's called now? ♦
